In their own words...
Name: Fitch
Job: Following a recent disagreement with my employer, I am currently a full-time poet, hoping to publish my first collection very shortly.
Marital status: Single, though I'm pretty sure Judy will be up for giving things another go soon.
Principal reason for going on this trip: Well, it's important that us guys create something. Like a monument to our friendship, sort of thing. Because the world is changing, dude, and in ten years' time we're all going to be covered in glaciers.
Essential item to take with you: A notebook. For putting poems in.
Name: Macrae
Job: Royal Marine.
Marital status: Fucking randy.
Principal reason for going on this trip: Getting Fitchy laid. Lad's totally lost his mojo and only a horny Swedish honey can pump it back into him. Plus maybe I can get some action myself as well.
Essential item to take with you: 8" hunting knife. And drugs.
Name: Wentworth
Job: Advocate.
Marital status: None of your business.
Principal reason for going on this trip: That's a very pertinent question; normally the very idea of spending a night in a tent would be utterly intolerable. So I suppose one would have to say 'duty': if I don't go, Fitch's delicate constitution is at serious risk from that neanderthal oaf Macrae.
Essential item to take with you: Compact mirror.
Name: Jones
Job: Fitch's cat.
Marital status: On the prowl.
Principal reason for going on this trip: Mayhem and shagging.
Essential item to take with you: Sausages.